Why Parents Should Never Insult Children

Why Parents Should Never Insult Children

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The power of words can be more effective on a child than negative actions, such as punishment. There are families who do not see an insult to put a nickname on the child or say things like "you are lazy", "you are stupid", "how ugly you are today" ... They do not consider that it could have any significant impact on the development of their child, without However, it can do more damage than you think.

Therefore, in let's talk about the reasons why parents should never insult children and on the consequences that this gesture could bring.

Insult is defined as those words we say to a person in order to offend, belittle, assault or mock on a certain moment. Therefore, any word depending on the context and the tone in which you use it can become an insult.

- Insensitization
Sometimes we are so used to disrespect that we become immune to it and underestimate the impact it can have on a child. If you want to be sure if it is an insult or not, just imagine that your child or your partner said it to you at one point. Would you feel like he's being loving?

- Incompetence
Sometimes situations overtake us and when we feel that nothing is working and we find ourselves without sufficient strategies to manage a conflict, we use any resource to stop it, even if that means harming others.

Perhaps you may come to think that the insult can be effective in getting your child to obey you or to come to his senses, however, you should know the consequences of insulting to assess whether it is worth doing it.

- Impulsiveness
You know the theory and what should not be done, but the situation has become so overwhelming that you are not weighing the pros and cons and you get carried away by the circumstance. An adult must control the situation and not catch up with those who matter most to him, or even surpass him, without being aware of what this "damage" can really do to him. Remember that a minor has fewer strategies than an adult, although sometimes you may think otherwise.

Here we summarize some of the consequences that insults can cause in the emotional and social life of your child.

1. Insults damage self-esteem
Expressions like "How fat you are!" or "How lazy you are!" They will not encourage your child to change his attitude, quite the contrary. Far from motivating him in any way, you promote insecurity in your child and increase his rejection of change.

2. Your child will not learn to express emotions
The insult is the most basic and ineffective resource to express emotions. So when young children are frustrated they turn to "bad" or "silly" instead of "I'm angry because you won't let me go out to the park." This second option is more elaborate and requires a higher emotional level.

Therefore, it is essential that both you and your child learn to manage emotions in a different way. If you as a model do not know how to do it, you will hardly be able to express your emotions properly when you feel anger or fear.

3. They take away your authority, cool the relationship and produce submission
This way of addressing your child may make him stop questioning certain limits or values ​​at that moment, but it will not make him respect you, trust you more or internalize what you were initially trying to teach him. Most likely, over time you will ignore those teachings even more, conflict and disrespect will increase.

4. They cause a lack of empathy and little tolerance for different opinions
Insults make your child stop putting himself in the place of others and, therefore, consider that disrespect is the only valid tool to impose his criteria against the rest. However, it is essential that you learn that, even if you are right, not everything goes for others to understand your point of view.

5. They favor conflict resolution aggressively
Your child imitates the way that the people around him have to solve their daily problems and you, being one of the figures of reference, you are encouraging him to have certain aggressive attitudes both at home and outside; that these are verbal does not make them less serious. Which in the end translates into a climate of tension at home, problems at school or with friends.

6. They enhance feelings of anger and revenge
When they hurt your feelings and disrespect you, you feel the desire to respond and defend yourself from all that pain that you are feeling at some point and you begin to develop hatred. Therefore, you do not reflect on the reasons why that person told you that, you do not seek to resolve the conflict or forgive others, but to generate harm in the other person.

You can read more articles similar to Why Parents Should Never Insult Children, in the category of Being mothers and fathers on site.

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